Scandalous headlines about JJMeijer flashed from Europe to Australia: “Sperm donor sued for incest”, “Strange: the man became the father of 550-600 children around the world”.
More than 40 women gathered at the House of Justice on the first day of the trial in The Hague (Holland). Not all found a place in the wood-paneled courtroom.
These were the mothers of JJMeijer’s children. Dutch TV was filming, so videos were available to view. Among those who attended were Natalie and Suzanne Dijkdrenth, whose son is now ten years old.
Here are Marie, who came for her 14-year-old daughter, and Eva, the plaintiff.
German married couple Mareike and Chrissy Flory watched the trial remotely in a village in Rhineland-Palatinate. They had twins using JJ Meijer’s sperm donation.
The plaintiff who initiated the court case is publicly known only as Eva, she wants to protect herself. The woman had a son from JJ Meijer, who is now four years old.
Eva, together with the Donorkind Foundation, a Dutch organization that campaigns for the rights of donor children, has filed a civil lawsuit, the likes of which has probably never been done before.
Allegations: Donor JJ Meijer is a threat to children born after his sperm donation, he deliberately misled their mothers. In addition, he violated social standards of care by becoming the father of several hundred boys and girls.
During the trial, ethical and moral issues were also examined: how many children can a man have? How can you stop someone from reproducing en masse?
JJMeijer produces and uploads videos to the social network YouTube. He is a musician and a self-proclaimed cryptocurrency consultant.
In one of the questionnaires, the man described himself as a dreamer.
“The happiest moments of my life have always been when my mother or one of my sisters gave the world a new baby,” said the Dutchman.
He has generously donated his sperm over the years to fertility clinics, sperm banks and privately in Europe and beyond. The Dutchman is said to be the father of more than 500 children worldwide. According to the plaintiffs’ calculations – up to 1000.
JJ Meijer lied: he hid from the future parents how many children he fathered through his sperm donation. That’s according to a 38-page detailed statement of claim.
The age of the children resulting from this deception ranges from a few months to 15 years.
They have been launched in Australia, Canada, Kenya, Ukraine, Italy and Germany, according to sperm donor JJ Meijer. Especially many of his descendants around The Hague.
They meet each other at schools, sports events, some even go to the same day care center.
The judge asked if JJMeijer would like to add anything.
“Here I am represented as a wild bull with a peculiar quality of reproduction. Anyone who follows my YouTube videos knows that I don’t believe in evolution. I believe in creativity,” said the Dutchman.
More than 13 years ago, in December 2010, Natalie Dijkdrenth clicked on the profile of a good-looking blond man on Dutch fertility website Verlangen naar een Kind (Longing for a Child) on her computer.
“On a website that connects prospective fathers and sperm donors, similar to a dating platform, about 20 men offered to donate their sperm privately,” recalls Natalie.
But many wanted to be a sperm donor during sex, which was unacceptable to Natalie.
Natalie and her wife Suzanne raise her daughter and son Thijmen, who is eleven years old. About the fact that he had hundreds of half-brothers and sisters, both explained to him subtly, “You are part of one of the biggest families in Holland.”
Natalie has wanted to have a child for a long time, but it is not easy for her, a lesbian. She did not want to go to the clinic. One of the reasons is that she wanted to see a man with up to 50 percent of her child’s DNA.
“I’m not looking for a relationship, I’m happy to just be a donor. Contact between me and the child is possible later. My sperm is of high quality (80-100 million sperm per milliliter). My talent is music, I play many instruments”, this is an excerpt from the profile of a sperm donor on the German website Spermaspenderinfo.net.
JJMeijer wanted to donate his sperm in a jar. On the Dutch website, he did not use his real name but called himself Martin. He claimed that he was a teacher and did not want his students to know that he was a sperm donor.
Natalie understood this behavior of the sperm donor because she is also a teacher. She also liked his profile because everything was so clear and well written. Natalie sent him an email.
JJMeijer answered him quickly. And he said what she wanted to hear. For example, to donate his sperm to a maximum of five women. She is the third.
They agreed to meet in one of the cafes in the city of The Hague. It was like a date. That same month, she went to JJMeijer and picked up her first jar of sperm.
Now, several women have started a Facebook group called Donorkind 102 JJM to share information about him. The group has 154 women from different countries and is growing.
Many mothers are hesitant to speak publicly. Maybe because sperm donation is still associated with shame.
In addition, JJMeijer threatens to cut off contact with his children if they speak to the media.
In this way, the Dutchman has a means of exposure in his hands.
Children born from sperm donation can be extremely difficult psychologically without the opportunity to communicate with their biological father.
Women upload photos of their children to a Facebook group. This is a gallery of blonde girls and boys. N. Dijkdrenth is afraid that they are very similar.
Most mothers are interested in stopping JJMeijer. In addition, they seek to draw the attention of politicians to a problem similar to the Dutch case.
Sperm donation is largely unregulated across borders. There is no central sperm donor registry in the Netherlands or elsewhere in Europe.
In Germany, since 2018, there is even a federal register of sperm donors. But the private sector is difficult to control.
In many Facebook groups and online platforms, any man can upload his profile picture and offer sperm.
Dutch authorities first drew attention to JJMeijer in 2017. A group of mothers presented evidence to the Association for Obstetrics and Gynaecology. The country’s Ministry of Health ordered an investigation.
Conclusion: Between 2007 and 2017, in addition to personal donation, JJMeijer gave his sperm to at least eleven Dutch clinics, from which 102 children were born. As a result, the Facebook name of the mothers’ group is Donorkind 102 JJM.
In Holland, clinics oblige sperm donors by contract not to donate anywhere else, and many – 12 families at most. But this number is not legally established, it is only a guideline. JJMeijer knew how to get around them.
Marie was 38 when she came across sperm donor JJ Meijer’s profile online. She had not yet found a suitable man and after much deliberation decided to become a mother using sperm donation.
Like N.Dijkdrenth, she met JJMeijer in one of the cafes in The Hague. He told Marie about a friend whose partner could not get pregnant.
That’s why he now wants to help women like Marie. JJ Meijer probably told this story to all those who want to become mothers.
Back then, he left the impression of someone worthy of Marie’s trust. “If that’s what you want from me, then I’d like to visit your house and see where the baby will live,” JJ Meijer said. He gave the impression of someone who really cares.
On another visit to Marie’s house, in the bathroom, JJMeijer squeezed his sperm into a vial. She underwent an artificial insemination procedure. After the second attempt, Marie became pregnant in December 2008. Now her daughter Mia is already a teenager.
When the girl was already grown, JJMeijer contacted Marie again and asked if she would like a second child.
It was strange to her: why should he donate his sperm? After all, he didn’t get money for it.
The English version of Wikipedia has the entry “List of persons with the most children”.
In first place is the Mongol Khan Genghis Khan, followed by the British, who is said to have impregnated up to 1,000 women, the king of Eswatini (Swaziland), who had 70 wives. Behind him is JJ Meijer.
Is this what he wanted?
Mothers who had children from JJMeijer have different attitudes towards him. It’s not always just disgust. For example, one German woman defends the Dutchman and says that he is a nice man and her child keeps in touch with him.
She thinks it’s wrong that now he’s called a “serial sperm donor”, sounds like a “serial killer”.
“What are the kids supposed to think when they Google him later?” – asks the German woman.
Mothers, on the one hand, are victims of his deceptions, on the other hand, thanks to him, many women could fulfill their greatest desire. When a child is born, he congratulates, asks for a photo, and is even said to have a list of names.
But JJMeijer does not take into account the fact that his “generosity” means a social and psychological burden for many children. In addition, there was still the risk of incest.
Holland is a small country. The majority of children born through private donation come from the region around The Hague. Many are already in their teens and meet at school sports events. Their mothers are worried about the question: what will happen when they fall in love?
“I don’t think it’s a problem. After all, Mia can ask every guy she’s going on a date with in advance if they’re related,” JJMeijeris wrote to Marie.
“Why don’t you go to the big clinics?” Why am I sitting here even though I am in contact with all the children and parents? As a result, the possibility of sexual relations between related persons and blood mixing is practically zero”, said sperm donor JJ Meijeris during the court proceedings.
On September 26, 2019, the German Mareike Flory received an email from the Danish company Cryos International, the world’s largest sperm data bank: “We wrote because you have registered a pregnancy with a sperm donor RUUD. It became known to us that RUUD provided sperm in countries outside of Denmark. In this way he has breached the contract.”
Mareike Flory went to the clinic with his wife Chrissy. They paid money for sperm from a trusted donor to fertilize her eggs.
Cryos International supplies sperm from Denmark to more than 100 countries. It is a profitable business. Mareike and Chrissy ordered sperm in 2017 for 1320 euros.
The couple saved the sperm donor’s description in case the children had questions later.
From many pages, Mareike and Chrissy learned that Ruud resembles Hollywood actors Brad Pitt and Chris Hemsworth.
He has seven siblings and is remarkably intelligent. It is also written that Ruud loves cats, his favorite car is a convertible. But the most important thing is unknown: Ruud is actually mass sperm donor JJ Meijer.
In 2015-2019, he went not only to Italy, Germany and Ukraine, but also to Denmark once a month. And Cryos International gave the sperm there.
“It’s really hard to fathom. At the European level, everything is standardized, even bananas. But there are no rules regarding sperm donation,” Mareike wonders.
She and her wife, Chrissy, are not personally upset with JJMeier, but with the sperm bank and the system that makes cases like Holland’s possible in the first place.
In 2017, around the time Mareike and Chrissy ordered sperm, JJMeijer sperm was banned from Dutch clinics.
But the German couple was informed by Cryos International only two years later. During that time, the company continued to ship JJMeijer’s sperm.
Mareike and Chrissy are in contact with many German families who have had children from JJMeijer. Others live in Heidelberg and Mannheim, there are families in Cologne, Berlin, Haltern am See, Bergisch Gladbach. But most are in North Rhine-Westphalia because it is close to the Dutch border.
Even before the start of the trial in The Hague, JJMeijer visited Kenya. He has already donated his sperm in this country. Most likely, fertilizing the egg this time became the goal of his trip.
Two weeks later, the court in The Hague announced the verdict. JJ Meijeris faces a fine of up to 100 thousand euros and a ban on donating his sperm to new parents who want children. His sperm stored in clinics must be destroyed.
Mareike Flory says the sentence is harsh but fair. N. Dijkdrenth and his wife raised champagne glasses for him.
But Natalie added: “He took away our child’s chance of a normal life. Besides, Jonathan is still young, he is fertile. Who knows how he will behave abroad, perhaps under a fake name. And how do you want to control it?” This process is far from over.
Prepared by Ona Kacėnaitė
